October
November
December
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February
February 14th
I stumble through the jaded forest, not seeing, not feeling, not hearing. Silence, blackness, death clogged my vision.
"Gah!" I cry out, tripping over a tangled root, letting my pursuers get even closer.
I continue running, not stopping, just trying to run away, run from fate, run from people peering into my life, run from reality.
Ever since she left, months p*censored*ed by in a blur, I didn't bother looking back, only lived in the past of my memories with her.
We had shared tears, blood, and laughter through the few months we had known each other- but it was all torn away from me.
The gifts were gone.
The photos were gone.
All I had was my memories.
I've heard of the saying heartbroken, but until then I never realized it was true, a literal feeling. It felt as though a dull pounding in my heart, throbbing, pulsing with pain with each beat. I would have sworn that with her gone a chunk of my heart had been ripped out.
I continued stumbling through the forest, the emerald light filtered by the millions of leaves in this place.
I hated it. I hated how she had left me, deserted me, left with a simple note that said only good bye...
I hated how she had taken her gifts with her, her love, her care, her warmth and laughter.
But most of all...I hated how my memories of her were fading. Oh, sure, right now I can remember her rotund, heart-shaped face framed by spikes of pink hair (or turquoise, or orange, or whatever colour she was interested in) her wide brown eyes, her cheerful smile perfectly. For now. But what about for the rest of my life? She had said she'd fade from my memory, and I'd get back to normal quickly.
She was wrong. I felt a deep desire for her, and I knew she was my wine, my fancy cigar, my anisthetic to reality. I realized I needed her to function normally- her laugh, her smile, her caring eyes- I needed her.
But she still left and faded away to non-existance.
I stumble through the forest, looking for her in a hopeless effort to regain my reality.