Remembering You

 

 

 

Dedicated to a person whom I've never met, but died last year around this time due to suicide.  While I can't say I've known her, my friend met her before and other comments left on the page of the local newspaper explained what a loving person she was.  Perhaps,  she wasn't really a 'nice' person, but, like most young people, probably had a very bright future ahead of her.  She'll rest in the hearts and memories of people as the young teenager who was the sunny smile amongst the crowds.

 

Note; This story is based around a similar idea, but has no details relating to the real situation.  If this isn't an appropriate topic to write about, I apologize and will delete it.  The story's supposed to be written through the eyes of somehow who remembers all the memories they shared with a friend of theirs who is now gone.

 

 

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When I heard you were gone, I refused to admit it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Denial.  That was the word.  Believe me, none of us wanted to believe you were gone, ripped from our hands by hurt feelings.  You never seemed like the type of person to inflict such a fate upon yourself.  As I had yelled at my parents when they told me, you were the sunshine.  Even if you didn't know someone, you'd always try to cheer them up...even if they gave you a disturbed look and inched away.  Your optimism was infectious...it was something I looked forward to each day.

 

How much disbelief pas-sed through me when they told me I wouldn't ever see your smiling face spouting gibberish again?

 

Nobody could imagine someone as bright and wonderful as you could fall at this fate.  You had such a promising future, filled with college degrees, succesful jobs, and a good life.  I still remember when I met you, not too long ago, and it feels like I've known you since we were babies.  You laughed, pleased at meeting someone, and introduced yourself.  At first, you were 'Lisa', but swiftly fell under the name of 'Maria', and then 'Yvonne', until you finally told me your real name.  You were that kind of person- the laughing, bubbly girl who everyone loved.

Somehow, even the people who were bugged by your constant smiling couldn't help but smile back whenever you pranced into the room.  It was like your mere presence brought a sudden burst of joy...that was likely the reality.  Why did someone have to treat you the way you did?  The stem which you grew on, nurished on, and helped you to begin to blossom into the young woman you were becoming...was cut, viciously, and without mercy.  Sometimes, at night, when no one else is around, I wish that someone else had done the deed instead of you...because then I would've known you left us as your normal self, and not as the drooping tulip we tried to prevent you from becoming.

 

There was that time, just a few months ago, when you brought us to your house to bake cupcakes.  I remember demanding that we do somthing else, as cup cake making was too 'childish' in my eyes.  However, you were able to change all that.   We messed up, yes, we truly did...scattering flour in between the tiles of your floors and dropping eggs, sploshing milk all over the counter...we made a real mess of your kitchen.  Not even pondering the true reality of the situation, you threw back your head laughing.

 

You always had the prettiest hair- slightly curly, and dirty blonde.  I envied you- though both of us had the same hair tone, mine could never look as wonderful as yours.  At one point it did- you styled my hair, careful not to put too many things on it or accidentally pull my hair while wrangling a tangle.  That time when you spun the chair around to show me the beautiful person I had become with just your hands, a comb, and some other things...it was breathtaking.

 

If I sit down in a quiet room and really concentrate, I can recreate the memory of your hands going through my hair, gently pulling it apart and spraying it lightly.  Your memory never dies- a photo of all five of us splayed out in a star on lush, emerald gras-s stands upon my nightstand, and each morning, I awaken to see all of us, holding hands with beaming faces.  Out of all of them, yours was obviously the brightest.  Your bright eyes were always gleaming with emotions, mouth curled up in a smile, and your small dimple always showing...again, I was envious.

 

During the school choir, you always signed up for the solos.  Astounding everyone, including the teacher, you reached unbelievable notes that would put even professional opera singers to shame.  I noted how you seemed to do it effortlessly, arms open in a sign that told the world you were happy and open to everything anyone had to throw at you.  Sometimes, I wonder how such a spirit could be destroyed by a single person.  You never used to let other people bother you, laughing everything and anything off.

 

We'll always remember you as the happy person you were in our lives.  

 

 

Thank you.  c;