My eyes opened slowly. I looked around me, and saw that I was in a dentist's office, strapped down onto the chair. Beyond the dim room, it was total blackness. I shivered as the thought of being alone entered my mind.
" 'Allo there little girl!" an accented, cheery voice rang. "How's life goin'?" the voice said.
I ignored his question. "Who are you?" I asked.
"The Fine-toothed Dentist!" it replied.
"Where are you?" I asked.
"Nowhere to be seen, that's where!" it replied.
"Why are you talking like that?" I asked.
"I dunno!" it replied.
"Show yourself!" I demanded, feeling nervous talking to someone I couldn't even see.
Out of nowhere, a comb with very fine teeth walked in. It was tall, slim and dark (I chuckled quietly so it wouldn't hear me). It's teeth ran all the way down it's handle. It had stick-like arms and legs, and no eyes.
"Why am I here?" I questioned.
"For your appointment! I'm to give you fine teeth, like mine! Do you not want fine teeth?" it asked, with a hint of sadness that was meant to make me say:
"Okay, I want fine teeth. But will it hurt?" I looked at him mistrustfully. Even if it was a comb, it was still a dentist, and I can't think of anything that I hate and fear more than dentists.
"Of course not!" the dentist said. "But if you want it to.."
"No! Just but quick with it!" I commanded.
It smiled, flashing it's long fine teeth. "Wonderful!"
After a few minutes of squirming, suffering, exaggerating, and losing my mind due to the whirring noise of it's accursed instruments of doom, the procedure was over.
The dentist grinned. "Now your teeth is as fine as mine!" It pushed the giant examining lamp away and handed me a large hand mirror. I slowly opened my mouth, looked at my teeth.
"Wow." My teeth looked nice, and as the dentist said, very fine.
The dentist smiled, blushed, and giggled. "Why, thank you."
I looked at him, and examined the room again. It was a very large room. "You're weird," I stated.
It looked confused. "I don't understand."
"You're office is in the middle of nowhere, this place is empty except for us, you sound like a boy, but you act like a little girl, you gave me fine teeth, it didn't even hurt!, and everything in here is big!"
"Why thank you," it giggled again.
"Do not take that last part the wrong way!" I yelled, frustrated at the dentist. "Now what's going on! Why am I here!"
The dentist frowned. "You need a lollipop." It handed me one.
"I don't want a lollipop!" But contrary to my word, I took it anyway.
It sat down next to me. "I am the Fine-toothed Dentist. My office is a traveling office. I go around making people's teeth fine. I'm overjoyed when I have a patient, because, as you can see, it's lonely here. My methods of odontology and dentistry are a secret! And being a large comb, I like to have big things around me. It makes me feel better!"
"If you're lonely here, get a job at another office! There will be lots of people there, and You won't be all alone!"
"True," it said sadly, "but I'm a large comb! No one will leave me alone, and so i can't practice dentistry! Besides, I'm not always lonely, I have internet here! Sometimes the connection is bad, but I get to 'meet' new people and they never have to see me!" It sounded happy when it said that.
I had no right to tear it away from it's 'home' and bring it to the world where strange things are put under microscopes.
"Okay, then." I sighed. "How do I go home?"
"Tap your feet three times and wish to be home!"
"What?"
"Run out of my office. Keep running, and you'll be at you're home again." It pointed out into the darkness enveloping the office.
I did as it told me to. I ran and ran, and heard it's voice behind me.
"Your check up is in six months!" it shouted.
I rolled my eyes. I still dislike dentists.
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Warning! Contains a bad joke! Yeah, both ways of bad. Not that bad, but it depends on what you get from it.
Yes, I have dentophobia. Can you tell I have monophobia too?
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