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4:30pm Sep 19 2012 (last edited on 5:52am Sep 21 2012)
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Welcome to the Writers' Circle, a group made up of writers that strive to better their writing abilities, whether it is with sentence structure, character development, or the many other topics that will be demonstrated and talked about in this group.
This group revolves around its members. A registered member will typically visit this thread once every couple of days. I'll ask that everyone subscribe to this thread so a notification will be sent to inform you that there's been an update. If for some reason, you don't want to participate in any given activity I have posted, you don't have to. Joining this is entirely optional, as is participation. However, the more inactive you are, the less you will get out of the group.
A Loose List of Topics We'll Discuss - This is not a finished list, nor is it entirely deive. I will have activities posted for each new topic-
> Sentence Structure > Character Development > Style of Writing > Prose and Poems > Grammar/Spelling/Common Errors > How to Critique > How to Effectively RP (Only upon request)
If you're currently not a member of the Writers' Cricle and are interested in joining, please Rmail me.
Do not post on this thread unless you have permission. Anyone who does not adhere to this will be blacklisted and unable to join.
hello my name is elder price
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4:30pm Sep 19 2012 (last edited on 9:20pm Nov 2 2012)
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Posts: 3,828
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Staff
> Shadow - Group Leader/Admin
> Russ -Wren- Assistant Group Leader
> Loki - Lurker/Admin > Detneth - Moderator
> CH - Moderator
Members
> PepsiPepperoni
> FluzzMe
> RabbitWings
> minuette1298
> Megabyte
> Dragonstar
> ipod2259
> RuRu13 > Tryst
> Zachrock
> Wolfiebelle
> Supermonky > GreenKat
hello my name is elder price
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4:30pm Sep 19 2012 (last edited on 5:29pm Sep 19 2012)
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Normal User
Posts: 3,828
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Rules
The Writers' Circle is supposed to be a supportive, nurturing environment where writers should feel at ease with expressing their ideas and work. Therefore, I have a few rules that need to be said to help avoid arguments and wrongdoings.
> Do not degrade someone else's work > Comment with positive feedback and constructive criticism (Will get more in depth with this during the critique exercises) > If not a member, do not post on this board > If you feel uncomfortable about posting your work, or if something is bothering you, Rmail me > Any other problems, Rmail me > Have fun :)
hello my name is elder price
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4:30pm Sep 19 2012 (last edited on 5:29pm Sep 19 2012)
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Posts: 3,828
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Updates
Looking to recruit members! If you're interested in being staff or simply joining as a member, please Rmail me.
hello my name is elder price
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5:44pm Sep 19 2012
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Posts: 3,828
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September 19, 2012 | Update
Thank you all for joining the Writers' Circle. Hopefully we can bring back this section of the forums with artistic pictures and stories created through words.
For our first prompt, I want to start off with something a little lax. It may seem boring but right now, I want to take a look at everyone's writing, see where we stand now.
And I'd love to see how creative y'all are. ;3
As for how you should go about this prompt, simply write whatever you want. I'd like for this to be a prose and not a poem. A paragraph or two will suffice. I want effort! Post it whenever you're finished and we'll move on from there. Feel free to comment on someone else's writing. :)
Note - If you could subscribe while posting your first prompt (or bookmark, whatever works), that'd be much appreciated.
| Prompt 1
If you could have a superpower, what would it be? Yes, this prompt's probably been used for too often but here's the catch. If you could choose one out of the following superpowers, which would it be and why?
> The ability to control an army of your own personal salamanders. > The ability to make lollipops pop out of your hands, but you can only make twenty a day. > The ability to stop time, but only for five seconds at a time and only thrice a day. > The ability to rewind time, but only for five seconds and only twice a day.
Get posting!
hello my name is elder price
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6:34pm Sep 19 2012 (last edited on 9:46am Sep 20 2012)
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Posts: 7,283
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> The ability to make lollipops pop out of your hands, but you can only make twenty a day.
If I could choose any power from the ones above, I would choose to be able to have lollipops pop out of my hands - even if I was limited to only twenty a day. Oh, how I would love to have that power. As a kid, my favorite candy was lollipops; my dad would always make sure to get one for me when he went to the bank. Let's just say, my face would light up like fireworks at seeing the grape flavored lollipop in his hand every time he came home from the errand. So, I guess I chose the power because it reminded me of a nice childhood memory.
Back from hiatus. Open to more roleplays!
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6:55pm Sep 19 2012
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Posts: 5,310
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> The ability to control an army of your own personal salamanders.
~xXx~
If I could choose any superpower out of the ones listed, it would be the ability to control an army of my own, personal, salamanders. They are epic amphibians, even if they look like lizards. Plus, there are a ton of them -- approximately 550 still living -- that have "Salamander" as a common name. I would have so much fun in using them. Spying would be easy if I fixed a small video camera on their backs or heads. I could even use them as messenger-lizards. I could also use them as little kamikazes... But I would think the others would rebel. Don't want that happening.
This ability would also be best suited for a villain, not for a superhero because of the hole "spying lizard" thing. Those goody-goodies are above spying anyways.
Nothing can stop the US Air Force except lightning within five nautical miles.
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7:56pm Sep 19 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 4,211
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> The ability to contol an army of your own personal salamanders. Dang, if I could control an army of salamanders, I would be the happiest kid in the world. I mean, I don't really like super heroes in all, but why not? I could control them, catch robbers n' stuff. I just loved all those slimy, scaley, ribbity things. I started catching grasshoppers, and believe it or not I sent little messages on their backs. Salamanders are my favorites above all. I could just tell 'em something and they would just go save the day for me. I mean, I would find away to manually computerize their brains. Make them do the robot to make kids happy. Yeah, thats more my speed. Had enough of those emo kids. (Yeah, I know its a bit weak. But eh, thats my best for this subject.)
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3:30pm Sep 20 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 3,828
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Prompt 1
Even if it’s only for five seconds, even if I could only do it twice a day, I would have to opt for being able to rewind time. You don’t even want to know how many times I’ve made a fool of myself out in public, or how many times I’ve said something stupid and then wanted to crawl in a hole forever. Like one time I was running with my really heavy messenger bag that’s off the shoulder (imagine the running as limping/hobbling like a mental penguin) and I tripped over a tree root and face-planted on the ground. It wouldn’t be so bad, save for the fact that I did it in front of almost half of my entire high school.
If I could have rewound time right there, good lord, you’d bet your bottom I would have. There are so many times I’ve hurt myself because of my klutzy self; walking straight into doors, tripping while getting in the shower, and many other things I won’t mention. See, if I could stop time, I’d be able to make sure I don’t make a total idiot out of myself anymore.
That and maybe I’d work up the courage to talk to my crush and have the benefit of knowing that if I sounded like an injured sea lion, I could rewind and say something else.
hello my name is elder price
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8:34pm Sep 21 2012 (last edited on 8:35pm Sep 21 2012)
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Support
Posts: 1,586
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Prompt 1
If I could have any of those superpowers, I'd definitely rewind time. There are many occasions that I have said or done something incredibly stupid that I wished I could have undone. The power to turn back time is very useful, both to myself and others. I could warn then five seconds in advance if they're about to do something like step in front of a truck unknowingly.
Also, some moments I may wish to relive again, if just for sheer joy. I'm not sure if it would be the same if I knew it was going to happen, but it would be worth a try. I'd ride around the world on a bicycle with a fuzzy unicorn cap on my head and call myself the magical Time Blaster. Five seconds could change everything, you know.
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7:59pm Sep 22 2012
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Posts: 3,809
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Prompt One.
Alright. I'm doing this wrong. I know. But oh well. I don't want any of those abilities. I don't want to be able to control my own personal army of salamanders because I don't like controlling things. I'd rather something be with me of its own will than because it must be. And I don't like lollipops. If I had the ability to stop world hunger, sure. But I don't like lollipops.
Moving on. I don't think time is something that should be messed in. I'm weird, I know. But still. I'd be too worried that if I stopped time I wouldn't be able to get it going again. Yeah. I know. As I said I'm a weirdo. And a failure. And rewinding time. Again. Worry about screwing things up. And breaking things. I break things a lot, you see.
Yeah. When I was a kid, all I wanted was the ability to fly. I don't anymore, not as much, and I guess that's kind of off-topic, but just saying. I was never that imaginative of a child, and none of these things appeal to me.
/derp out.
Well now. I should... Probably put something intelligent here. At some point. Eventually.
...
... Screw it. HYE. ♥
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1:53pm Sep 23 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 4,744
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Prompt One
I would have to choose to rewind time for five seconds twice a day. I have made too many mistakes, told too many lies, and hurt too many feelings not to choose this. Just to know that I can take back a word, remove a feeling, repair a person, that is all I really could ask for in life. I have hurt so many people and been stupid so many times, it is uncountable. To be able to rewind time would be such a pleasure.
Also, what about everything good that has happened that you wish could happen again? I don't have enough happiness in my life, and to be able to rewind and have your first kiss twice, or hold your puppy for the first time again, that would be all too wonderful. Having your crush tell you that you look beautiful, or having your best friend apologize and make up with her, those things are so sweet and fragile, and life tears them up and destroys them. To be able to relive small moments of sheer joy would be incredible.
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5:17pm Sep 23 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 5,542
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Prompt One:
If I had any of the powers listed, it would be to produce the twenty lollipops come out of my hands. I mean, seriously, that would be one awesome power for me. I have an incredibly bad sweet tooth and am in the constant need to have candy. Sure lollipops may not be my ideal choice of candy to be able to produce at random, but they will suffice. I've also had the habit to want to bite things, weird I know, but the lollipops could help with that too. I could bite the stems for a while, which i've done until they fall apart in my mouth. I'd be able to give lollipops to people as well, which is pretty cool because people randomly ask me for candy often.
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6:18pm Sep 23 2012 (last edited on 12:06pm Sep 24 2012)
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Posts: 3,828
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September 23, 2012 | The Basics
When you break the English language down to its core, it’s amazing to think that just out of twenty-six letters, life-changing written works, famous quotes, even knowledge can be shared. The arrangement of these letters sometimes depend on someone’s mood, on someone’s beliefs, dreams, fantasies, you name it. Writing is a means of shattering impossibilities. You can do anything.
It takes a lot of talent and a lot of hard work to be someone like Mark Twain or William Faulkner. It takes dedication, experience, and just a pinch of inspiration. Not all of the greats that we look up to started streaming perfect works out from their fingers as toddlers. They learned to read and they learned to write. Their first works were probably horrendous, laughable.
So let’s learn the basics.
Common Misspellings
> Your/You’re > Their/There/They’re > Then/Than
> Its/It's > A lot
Your signifies that something belongs to someone else. That is your pancake. Why is your butt in the way of my hand? What is your problem?
You’re is the contraction for “you” and “are.” You’re being dumb. You’re in a state of shock. You’re amazing.
If you’re not sure when to use which one, simply take “you’re” out of its contraction and throw it in the sentence to see if it makes sense. That is you’re pancake [That is you are pancake] X You’re being dumb [You are being dumb] ✓
Their shows possession. That is their pancake. Why is their butt in the way of my hand?
There is used to indicate a place, or to say that something simply is. The pancake is over there. The butt is right over there next to the hand. There are amazing people around here.
They’re is the contraction for “they” and “are.” It’s used similarly to “you’re” except it’s not used when talking about a person directly. They’re eating all of the pancakes. They’re being rude.
Than is used when comparing two or more things. I like pancakes better than waffles. I like him more than her.
Then is used when talking in a sequence of events. Then let’s go over there Then he can get his pancakes and go home.
Its is used to show possession in place of his/her. Its disgusting tongue lapped up all of my pancake mix.
Its breath smelled putrid.
It's is used as a contraction for "it" and "is."
It's perfect weather for making pancakes.
It's really gross how that thing ate my pancake mix.
It is not alot. A lot is two words. Two words.
When to use the comma
I see people do this all the time. She walked up to him, he turned around, she sat down, he took her hand.
A comma is not used as an excuse to make a run-on sentence. Nope. A comma isn’t used the way your teachers taught you in school either. My teachers, at least.
A comma is used when it’s needed to make the sentence complete, but it can also be added for tension and to simply place a pause.
This being said, you don’t always have to put a comma before “but.” Yes, I know many of your teachers taught you that you have to. You really don’t. Some writers don’t do that because really, it’s an awkward pause.
I asked her out but she said no.
That sentence is read without any pauses and one could get from that sentence that the character probably said it in a rush, which would give off a different vibe than this:
I asked her out, but she said no.
Sentences like these typically require commas because they’re two independent clauses: Twirling around with her staff in hand, she struck a sharp blow on the man’s head. Looking upward, she spotted the bird in the sky.
(If you use these sentences, as most writers do, make sure to check your work and read back. I know a lot of people, myself included, that have overused those sentences before.)
I’ll hit some more stuff later but let’s let you mull that over for a bit.
Websites for extra help
| Application
Write a quick short story, any topic, that involves some of the contractions, correct spellings, and comma usages we just talked about.
hello my name is elder price
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7:17pm Sep 23 2012
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Posts: 4,744
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Topic is someone asking someone out I guess. I'm brain dead, sorry. Told from a boys perspective, even though I'm a girl. Here goes:
My palms were sweaty, and my face looked nervous and pale. I had practiced this for hours, but I never really thought I would have the courage to do it. Running my fingers through my light brown hair, I started to walk over to her. My legs were shaking, and I kept taking in sharp, hard breaths that seemed to burn through my chest. She caught my eyes, and I quickly turned away. I was too nervous to even think straight. After what seemed like hours, though it was only a few short seconds, I reached the end of the hallway. I saw her fair blonde hair and her warm smile, and I felt sick to my stomach. I asked her out and she said yes.
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7:40pm Sep 23 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 5,310
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This one is about one of my characters getting turned into a vampire. Its old so...
~xXx~
Sitting in my parent's house is always a bore. They were fighting outside again. In the back to be more specific. I sighed and lowered my head to the wooden table in our kitchen. I hated that so much. Standing up, I walked out, leaving my parents to their bickering. As I left, I ran into my friend who had just conveniently waited outside for me. A smile flashed across my face as we took off down the streets, off to create mayhem and destruction. Not to mention chaos and disarray.
As the hours passed, my friend and I had a blast as we caused trouble around our village. And, I'm eighteen and causing trouble. I smiled as that thoughts passed through my mind's eye. As we continued our little trouble-making rampage, we kept no track of the time and soon it was midnight and the full moon shone brightly over head. Saying good nights, we went our separate ways. But as I walked home, I had this nagging suspicion that somebody... something was watching me.
And the next thing I knew is that a pretty female with icy blue eyes was drinking my blood from my neck with sharp canine fangs. A normal person did not have fangs! But at the time, I didn't know that see was a vampire until she fed me her blood. Unimaginable pain blossomed throughout my entire body as her blood changed it somehow. My top canines inched downwards and so did the teeth behind them. My jaw burned with intense pain as my teeth were elongating and growing a hell-lot sharper. My light light gray eyes started to take in every detail that they looked at. As they started to glow, my jaw hurt again. A pained whine escaped my throat and I rolled over onto my left side, curling into a tight ball. When the pain subsided, I poked one finger into my mouth to feel my fangs. Four on each jaw. Eight all together.
My maker's eyes were filled with confusion. “Random mutation,” she mumbled before taking off just as an intense wave of thirst overpowered my system...
Nothing can stop the US Air Force except lightning within five nautical miles.
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8:32pm Sep 23 2012
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Posts: 4,211
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Perspective of one of my characters in a piece of writing outside res. It was a bright day today, the sun was shining enough to make me smile for the first time in weeks. Marjorie and I were playing tag on this day. Though my hair was short and thick, I could still feel the wind running across my scalp. I chased my freind as fast as I could, but she always beat me at this game. Before I could slow, Marjorie stopped and I scooted right into her back. "Marjorie!" I screeched, "Why are you stopping?!" She pointed at a car that had arrived in the parking lot. I was scared, my heart pumping one thousand miles per hour. St. Helen's Orphanage seldom had visitors, being in a small town in the middle of nowhere. A man and a woman stepped out of the car. I am near sighted, but I could tell that the man had curly black hair and snake-like green eyes that watched my every move. And the woman had long blonde hair that reached her knees and blue eyes that were as cold as stone. I swear I saw some kind of wings fading behind her. Her lips moved like liquid as she spoke. "Harold, there she is. Get her." The next thing I knew, I was fighting for my life, scratching the man's - or Harold - face like a wild girl to avoid getting in the car. With one sock to the jaw, I was out. I had lost. The last thing I heard was Marjorie's voice calling my name. Jacky! Don't leave! Jacky!
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12:00pm Sep 24 2012
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Posts: 9,641
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So according to Shad, I'm to write a story on the use of contractions and commas. Well, what you've here is a perfect example of 'how many contractions and commas can Det use?'. I mean, look at this. It's so beautiful, and I know you'll all love it. C'mon, don't lie to me. If they do, if you do, they're, and you're, just jealous.
If this is too difficult for you to comprehend, don't worry, because you'll just have to learn...eventually. I don't even know what I'm doing anymore, but I s'pose it's your and their sentiment on what I'm doing that counts. You're all just going to have to deal with it.
Anyways, this is a lot (not really) of writing, and I should stop soon because I'm getting bored and tired and my muse is, quite swiftly, running away from me. Metaphorically, not literally. That'd be silly.
I bid y'all adieu, Det |
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5:06pm Sep 24 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 1,557
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Sometimes I wonder if bugs can see us and if there is something so big on out earth that we're unable to see. I know, I know, this sounds stupid, but really, have you ever thought about it? I guess that I got the idea after playing Spore (the PC one, not the DS version,which I thought sucked) more than a few times. You know how in the beginning and you start the game out a small green oval with eyes and a mouth? You get to choose whether you're a herbivore or an omnivore. Anyway, back to the point. At first, everything seems bigger than you, but when you level/grow up/get a bigger brain, you start seeing thing much, much bigger than you that you've never noticed before. If you ever look closely at background, you can see things like huge shell-looking things that seem small right before you're about to become a land creature.
So, back to bugs and other small things. Can they see us? I know that they can interact with us (I've suffered more than a few bite from seemingly harmless small insects before), but can they actually see us? Also, is there things that we cannot see because they are so big they just don't registered? Take the Earth for example. Everyone knows that the Earth is round (at least, I hope they do...), so why does it look flat to us? Is it because the Earth is so large and the... rate of circling to small that we don't notice it?(I know that there is an actual reason for this, but I'm to lazy to look it up...)
[[/endrant. There was no point to this xD ]]
~rabbah
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5:18pm Sep 24 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 5,542
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So, i guess I'll write from the view of two brothers, one observing what the other is doing... THey're vampires.
Shunsuke was visibly shaking and it kind of freaked me out. His eyes were dilated, which wasn't something I'd seen before. Sure, our eyes dilated when we were hungry, but it's still weird to look at him when they're like that. It's like staring myself in the face. A blood thirsty look plastered itself on his face. His canines, which were long to begin with, were lengthening more. They were probably a good two or three inches. His nails blackened and elongated into sturdy, sharp weapons. They still looked like nails, not some weird claws or whatever humans tend to mistake them for. I could tell he'd picked up someone's bloody scent. Humans always had a particular scent to them and it was just too appetizing for either of us to pass up, but I controlled my urges better. His animalistic instinct was rearing its ugly head and was taking over my brother's body. Just as the vampiric side of him fully emerged, I brought my fist back and swung, striking a clean blow to the right side of his face. It hurt like hell, I'll tell you that, but it stopped him in his tracks. He fell to the floor, howling in pain while surpressing that vampiric side of him. His pupils returned to normal and his nails went back to their 'human' color. He hissed darkly at me, but thanked me through gritted teeth. "You should be more careful. You're going to end up gettin us discovered because some poor sap,er... human, is going to end up dead on the side of the road. Drained of blood. That's not something we want, right?"
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