Gage had no idea what the hell Nicole was thinking about. However, if he did, he wouldn't know whether to be offended or flattered...or neither. He was spending time with Nicole to make both her and himself feel better. It seemed somewhat selfish to him to be spending time with another person just to make himself feel better, but maybe it was a little less because that wasn't all he was doing. After all, he was still comforting her. The only thing was, while he was doing that, he was really comforting himself.

He smiled at her thanks, nodding a little. "It's no problem at all," he told her, eyeing her hand for a split second. Although he wanted to reach out for her hand, to hold it, he didn't. She wasn't up for grabs and he wasn't going to be her rebound, if that was the kind of girl she was. Though, Gage was sure that she wasn't. "Let's keep going."

( HOLY HELLLL. )

Nicole wasn't sure of too much, but she knew one thing for sure: She loved Gage. As a friend, but she loved him. Why was it so hard to be around him? Maybe being with him reminded her of being around Jay, but hardly. Gage was a short, sweet blonde kid. The opposite of Jay.

Without replying to Gage, she was having a conversation with herself in her mind. One of the things she was debating the most was calling Jay and telling him to come to the park, too. She knew that she needed him. Nicole knew she felt like nothing without him. His hugs, his touch, his kisses, everything.

One of the things she missed most is feeling like he really did love her. It wasn't breaking up that made her feel like he didn't love her, it was the moment Zooey had told her what Jay had done, Nicole realized he may have loved her in the begining, and he may have loved her after Kurt was dead and gone, but at one point she was just kinda there.

Maybe he had loved Nicole all along, but his act made him look like he had taken her for granted. And, maybe she had made it too obvious she would be there for him no matter what. She'd always be there for him and just him. Nicole would be his shoulder to cry on, and she'd hug him and she'd love him, and when he was alone, she'd be the one to curl up against his body while he slept.

Maybe it was just her fault for putting herself out there like that. And, in which case, if she was always gonna be there, then there really was no reason for Jay to fight for her. Because, of course, she'd be there for him through thick and thin. Which, most of the time, it was thin.
Either way, Nicole was unsure of a lot more now than she had been before.

When she finally snapped back to reality, she realized she was still with a kid that did love her. With a kid that was there for her when she needed him the most. But, Nicole still had to act like she was alright with this kid. "Where is the park, again?"

As they walked, Gage couldn't help the guilty feeling that was creeping up on him. He'd known all along what Jay felt and what he did. Of course, he'd known. He was like Kurt's diary or something; most of the things he thought about, Gage got to hear about. Jay was more reserved, but he shared a lot, too. Not as much as Kurt, though. Kurt was a motormouth. Why everyone came to him when they wanted to talk, Gage didn't know. Maybe it was because he didn't have a big mouth, or he just seemed like the type who would listen.

So, maybe he was everyone's diary. Kurt told him what happened over the phone, feeling guilty. Jay told him not too long after Kurt did, asking for advice. It was funny how he did ask for advice, anyway, seeing as he was a sophomore going on to be a junior soon. Jay was a senior then, and so was Kurt. And Hideo. And Oliver. They were all older than him, and yet it seemed like he was the most mature. Mature in some ways, immature in others.

When it came to life experiences, Kurt came in first.

Most of the time, Gage wished that people would go to Kurt for help rather than him. But, they never did. Gage guessed it was because no one wanted to bother him with their problems when he already had many of his own. Though, Gage thought that he was the only one who actually knew the majority of his problems, excluding Jay. Who knows what Jay knew? It was hard to tell.

Thinking about all that, Gage realized that he was taking a walk to help Nicole with her problems. Maybe he walked right into the job of being the listening ear, seeing as he was literally doing so at the moment.

For a moment, Gage didn't hear Nicole. Instead, he looked down at the ground. When he realized that Nicole had said something, his head lifted up. "Ah, right here, actually." he said, pointing past a tall tree that was thick with branches and leaves. It was hard to see past. "Want to go on the swings?" he asked, smiling at the other blonde. 

 To Nicole, swings brought back a lot of memories. Of Jay, what else? When he'd asked her out, and she sat there, completly unaware and looking dumb. Nicole hadn't been able to look him in the eye, she didn't want him to see her blush. Instead, she had looked at the ground, kicking the dirt.

 Or, even better, the time she had asked to sit on the swings and it had triggered yet another fight. Their wirst fight at the time. Nicole had wished it was still their worst fight. Because, at this moment, she'd give anything for his kisses, his hugs, his smell, his texts. Him.

  "Sure, why not?" Nicole replied, but she knew full well why she didn't want to. It wasn't the same park, but it held some sort of mutual feeling. "Gage, can I ask you something?" she asked, biting her lip. She knew what she wanted to ask, but she wasn't sure she wanted to hear the answers.

Seeing tears running down Nicole's cheeks, Gage panicked slightly. He was barely used to comforting his own friends, and now he was supposed to comfort his friend's ex-girlfriend? He'd always been an awkward one, the type of person who clung to his friends while they spoke for him. As his friends' high school careers came to a close, he was expected more of. To be there for everyone else when they couldn't depend on each other like they used to, that is. His thoughts circled and circled; they were all the same. The point was, how was he supposed to comfort a girl he barely knew?

"Uhm, well," Gage began nervously, starting to play with a pale blonde lock of his own hair. He'd grown up quickly; no longer did he spend an hour in front of the mirror straightening every lock of straw-colored hair to perfection. Though he wasn't too sure about a lot of things, he liked to think that he was grown-up. "he did. Kurt, Oliver, and Hideo teased him a lot, because that's what we do...or did. We teased each other about everything. Jay would tell us how sweet you were, how we should be friends with you, how we should all hang out some time...

"Thing was, Kurt was... Well, he wasn't entirely a jealous wreck. He was happy Jay was happy, but, of course, he was also upset. It looked like Jay was starting to move on, you know? He was starting to mature. I guess... Kurt was just desperate to keep things the same, and Jay..." The blonde paused. "Well, now. This doesn't answer your question, does it?"

"No, no. Don't worry about it." he assured her, reaching out to rub her arm. Suddenly, it wasn't so awkward to touch her anymore. All he felt was pity. Not the bad kind of pity, the type of pity where you wanted to help whoever you felt bad for by any means necessary. Compassion, perhaps? Whatever it was, Gage felt it and he was ready to take advantage of the emotion. From now on, he would try his best to cheer up Nicole. It seemed like she was the only link she had left between his best friends and himself. "I'll help you, Nicole."

"Hmm," The blonde hummed back an answer, thinking it would be the safest way to avoid a breakdown. On Nicole's part, of course. Gage couldn't afford any breakdowns right now, and not just for his sake. For the both of theirs. His green eyes blinked at her curiously. "I missed you too..."

Then, he blinked. "Wait, what?" he asked, his blonde eyebrows pulling together. "Nicole, everyone liked you. Honest. Things were just so complicated that it...just didn't feel that way, I guess."

Was it really all right to hold the hand of a girl who had just broken up with her boyfriend? Gage's green eyes flickered down to look at Nicole's hand touching his, her touch light but not hesitant at all. She really needed him. Well, perhaps Nicole didn't need Gage in particular, she just needed someone who would give a crap at this point.

Even before Jay and Nicole started dating, it was clear that Nicole almost elevated away from the rest of the cheerleaders. Did she have many friends? It was hard to tell when the cheerleaders were all supposed to be friends. Sometimes Jay and the others would discuss the people in the school, most of them turning out to be people that Gage had never seen. Perhaps he had, but if he had, he wouldn't be able to name them. Of course, the cheerleaders came up in conversation. Gage never caught on as to who was who, instead clinging to the fact that they were all upperclassmen and that they would be gone soon, so who gave a crap what their names were?

Nicole's name wasn't mentioned often, if it ever was at all. Maybe she was just that out of touch with the rest of the school, maybe with the rest of the world.

"Yeah, okay..." Hesitantly, Gage's hand curled into Nicole's, holding it. Staring at their hands, Gage carefully intertwined their fingers, long fingers mingling not-yet-mature male fingers. It was a bewildering sight, really. Perhaps there was a chance that someone would mistake Gage for Nicole's child. She could very well be a young-looking mother and Gage could be an older-looking child of her's. Or maybe that was too unlikely, and they would look more like brother and sister. "St-start walking..."

God, he didn't even know where he was walking to. They passed the park, the houses, the whatever. He was starting to get sick of this feeling, the feeling where he felt masochistic for letting himself suffer through painful nostalgia. Gage felt like it would be easier to pull away from the past and move on rather than dwell on it and wonder how things could've played out differently. But, none of that was helping anyone, and it certainly wasn't going to bring Kurt back.

Kurt was going to stay dead and it seemed like any connection Gage had between him and his old friends was going to do the same. Pursing his lips, Gage stopped, looking up at Nicole. "Let's forget all about them, Nicole." he said suddenly.