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11:31pm Feb 27 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 622
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I really like that quote. I'm Catholic, and yes, it's considered a sin. But, only if two people of the same gender are to do anything more than kissing. I don't judge homosexuals, they have more rights then anyone else. I have a friend, almost a brother, that is homosexual. And I love him with all my heart, he is one of the funniest people you will ever meet. I don't understand why or how people can bring themselves to bully someone over that. I understand how you must feel about telling your father about something like that. I personally think it's better to tell him, anyways. Maybe he will understand, you still are his son and he will still love you. He might even support you. I wouldn't take anti-depressants. I would just stick with therapy, you don't want to go and do that. It may hurt you. I know you can make it through. :) Let's see...confession. I don't think this is much of a confession, but ever since the beginning of this school year I have a new perspective on my family. I fight with them a lot and I am really sassy. I got in a fight with my dad last night, he had made my brother cry. So I was really mad and I was calling him a jerk. He told me to go to my room but I just sat there and said 'You can't tell me what to do.' he would never touch me. But he yelled at me. I didn't seem scared though, even though I should of been. I felt really guilty afterwards, because either way he helped bring me into this world. I don't think my dad likes me, he blames a lot of things on me. But then there are times where you think he would die for me. I'm sort of confused with all the mixed signals he gives me. But I have my friends, they take my mind off of things. Personally, I don't mind fighting with my parents. I feel stronger walking away from them being right. I don't get grounded or much take away. I guess I can be called spoiled, even though out of the house I don't act near closed to spoiled. I don't want much. I don't need much, but I am very spoiled and I don't get in trouble for things. I don't know. My brother takes my rath, because if I'm mad at my parents, which is a lot, he gets a lot of my yells. He has grown not to trust me much anymore. Which I am upset about, I am trying so hard to win the love and trust of my family back. But think there is no use, and they will only live in the past.
(－_－) zzZ
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5:12pm Mar 1 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 2,056
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i am also catholic ... in my heavily catholic family.. but within my family i have great aunts.. who have been together for over 40 years.. they are in their 60's now and still love each other the same as they did when they were 20. It pisses me off when people say gays are nasty or they dont ever have true love!... my aunts are 60 and they still keep the love goin. like i said , raised catholic... Pro Gay rights and a lot of other things that Catholics hate...<333333
- just my little tid bit to throw into the talk about homosexuality
RAINBOWS and STUFF
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10:22pm Mar 1 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 622
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Yes, true love is true love. I respect that all the way. I hope they live the rest of there lives happily.
(－_－) zzZ
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9:30am Mar 7 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 157
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And on a non-depressing topic, you should really try a Doritos and Pepperoni sandwich on white bread. Maybe even add some Munster cheese, because it is amazing. ;o (The weird things I come up with when there's no food in the house, lol.)
sounds better than peanut butter and mayo sandwiches. i lived on those for months when i was younger and money was tight for my mom.
confessions none to date, might have some later.
i still LOVE Pokemon and I'm 35 years old.
take care all!
-hugs-
Cassa
i zap pets, 50 k per pet. rmail me for more details. -haat, ijaa, haa`it -truth honor vision- |
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6:30pm Mar 7 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 222
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I sometimes cut myself. I don't know why, its just relaxing to me. I know that you probably think I'm just an idiot, but its because you've never done it. Now, don't get the wrong idea, YOU SHOULDN'T DO IT, I wish i could stop but I just can't. Its horrible and leaves ugly scars, but no matter how hard I try to stop, it seems impossible. Please don't think horribly of me because of this. No one knows exept for one of my friends who does it too (And anyone who reads this).
The only reason people get lost in thought is because its unfamiliar territory.
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12:30pm Mar 8 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 114
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lanya, i used to cut. i understand that it's relaxing and helps, but you'll find other things to do. i got into running and getting tattoos, you'll find your own thing that'll help. ignore people that get mad at you but understand that it's because they care, and take advice from everyone. if people offer alternatives, try them, not just once because nothing works the first time. it took me a long time to get out of it but i haven't cut in years. it'll get better :) trust me.
and lazz, i think language should be a bit more... censored there xD |
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2:18pm Mar 8 2012 (last edited on 2:24pm Mar 8 2012)
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Artist
Posts: 3,205
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my family makes me feel like im a complete failure im fed up of being beat down, im looking forward to my mum moving out but i dont even want to live with her much any more. im shore ive mentioned it before but she has a problem with alcohol. the only good thing in my life (my boy friend) is depressed and never seems happy to the point its making me depressed ( i dont want to go in to too much detail why/ what his depressed about so sorry if that sounds really selfish on me) ive even though about therapy as my family are seriously screwing up my head, i haven't talked to my sister for months and im an out side im my own home. i want to vent again but im shore ive been over all this before so... yeah it just feels like every thing is heading to one big disaster |
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5:29am Mar 11 2012 (last edited on 5:30am Mar 11 2012)
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Normal User
Posts: 663
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my mom and i get into regular fights because, im not good enough, i am stupid...
everything seems to set my mother off. she says she wished that she never gave birth to me.
im a b**** at school, so everybody hates me... well the majority. I don't want to be mean, but it is just the way i deal with things, by lashing out and pushing other people away. I only became who i am today because i was always bullied when i was younger, and i snapped and started to fight back, which my words and body.
My friends all have to leave to go to another school, and the ones i have here are friends that at times don't even trust me.
I learned at a young age that when i cry, it angers my mom, so i learned to keep my tears in. I can't even cry anymore unless i am seriously in pain. when i do cry, i always keep it hidden.
my neighbors have called the police once because of how loud my mom and i were becoming during one of our fights, which lead to the police and orphanage visiting our house.
everybody i ever trusted always leaves, or forgets.
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4:39pm Mar 12 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 331
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Wow. This is what i've needed.
So, Kan has been madly in love.. okay, not madly in love.. But she has a big crush on her best friend. It's not a big confession, but i just need to share it with someone.
You see, ALL of my friends hate him, and he has been made fun of and bullied since he was a kid. And i guess i'm his only real friend.
That's why i don't want to tell him anything. Otherwise i wouldn't have a problem with telling him anything. I'm just affraid the friendship will be ruined and he'll be all alone again ;-;
Sheeran away
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5:29pm Mar 12 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 733
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Now I find myself back here. Some things have improved, but now I've got a couple even worse problems.
I can barely stand living in the same house with my family. I have to do everything for everyone, I sit down to have a snack, and now I've got to throw someone's trash away, or take care of something that isn't hurting anyone, but somebody just doesn't want it there. But when I ask somebody for something when they're relaxing, they just... blow up at me. My mother is always trying to find something wrong with me ('Oh, you can't see that, you need your glasses on,' or 'Is something wrong?' (she says that whenever I walk out of a room anymore, because 1: I don't smile that much anyway, 2: besides the fact that I'm not always happy I'm in the house, I have other things on my mind, that I can't seem to leave alone.)) It's driving me crazy. Yeah, I probably should wear my glasses, but I can see well enough, or at least function well enough without them for now, and I hate wearing them. I hate the way they feel, they give me headaches. And I hate thinking that I'm going to have to live the next two years by looking at everything through a lense. It doesn't feel right, it's not natural. I feel like I'm watching/living my life through a screen when I'm wearing my glasses, like watching TV, it makes me feel like nothing's real, and that my life is all just a joke. When I was younger, I almost couldn't deal with all of this (it's been going on that long) and I almost ran away, thinking that I'd be free for once to make my own decisions, even though I knew it would be dangerous and I might not make it that far. Now I know that it wouldn't have physically done me any good to 'leave,' as I used to think of it, but sometimes I have dreams of just being on my own out where there's no human sights or scents to clog my brain. I can think clearly and everything, I cling to those dreams so tightly when I wake up, I remember the whole thing weeks later.
I'm not eating breakfast during the school week anymore. I just can't stomach it that early in the morning, it makes me feel worse, slow and lazy. If I don't eat it, then I'm more alert somehow. I'm still eating a healthy amount though, and I do eat breakfast on the weekends when I'm able to get up a couple hours later.
I'm worried about one of my... friends. I mean, I only met him this year, and I've gotten to know him pretty well because my best friend grew up with him, and she's one of the few people he seems to trust, so the three of us end up together a lot. This might sound stupid, but people seem to really dislike him for being... for being himself. People have kind of singled him out to be popular, and he tries to play along, but he doesn't always quite cut it, and people will do things like steal his stuff, and after a while I've noticed that this really seems to bug him. Half the time when he walks into a classroom, the teacher will start yelling at him. That actually happened today in one of my classes that I share with him. During third period he walked in and the teacher totally blew up at him. He just walked across the classroom, he didn't do anything.
I know it's probably none of my business, but I can't help being concerned. I just think it's weird, and unfair that people keep bothering him when he wants to be left alone.
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6:05am Mar 17 2012 (last edited on 12:05am Apr 13 2012)
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Normal User
Posts: 709
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Hello, My father complains about my weight,my tomboyishness (Im actually a girl), He wants me to change. I feel like i don't make him happy. I feel like he thinks im going to turn into a homosexual. Its like i cant to be who i am without someone getting the wrong idea. Everytime he yells at me i bite myself. By the way im 12 5'3 and only 130 lbs.Ok, I have achulophobia(the fear of the dark).So every-time I turn off the hallway light i run out as fast i can. Then my parents look at me like I'm crazy. I'm afraid of the dark because of burglars,people with guns,and rapist.
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6:08am Mar 17 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 114
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there's nothing wrong with being a tomboy, or a homosexual xD but if your dad thinks you are, just because of how you look, that's his own issue and you need to not let it bother you. if you're 12, you've still got growth spurts to come along and you'll loose all the puppy fat (not saying you have any... i don't really know what your 'stats' would make you look like)
just don't let it bother you and in a few years you'll be taller and thinner :) but there's nothing wrong with being bigger than average either |
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3:15am Mar 20 2012 (last edited on 12:04am Apr 13 2012)
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Normal User
Posts: 709
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5:02pm Mar 20 2012
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Artist
Posts: 3,205
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once again this is more like a rant than a confession but here i go~ i had a rather disastrous hair dyeing accident that has left me ginger and green (nothing wrong with being ginger.... or green its just not what i wanted and doesn't suit me) i found out that some how ive become over drawn (the statement hasn't told me why so i need to go to the bank) and havent been paid even tho 'apparently' i have.... no i have not been payed over wise i wouldn't be in this mess and it would have showed up on my statement and in my bank!! so i have no money to sort out my hair or even sort out these money issues. Gah i hate banks.......and money........and my hair |
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5:09pm Mar 20 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 331
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Hm. My family is catholic i guess. And the fact that i didn't accept religion is my own thing. Nobody has the right to be mad at me or anything, right? Well my dad, who i hate because he's a total jerk (it's a long story) , He acts like i'm not his daughter at all, just because I don't want to go to church and I have a completely view of life.
Sheeran away
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7:15pm Mar 21 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 2,056
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.... my language wasnt bad... i said pisses once... piss isnt a swear word. its a slang term for pee. and if it was bad to say. res would have automatically bleeped it out ^^.
random confession time....
on saint patties day... i tried to drink enough bleach and drain-o to kill myself... i was caught just in time by my ex bf.... i spent my st.pattys day in the hospital.. and my parents are so ashamed of me. i feel like a non-stop disappointment to them. and i really want to escape life.
RAINBOWS and STUFF
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12:26pm Mar 22 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 1,651
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Oh no Lazz. I hope your okay. Don't escape life. You still have like another 70+ years to live. :c
I am online..
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4:39pm Mar 23 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 622
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Oh, Lazz. I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope you're alright, I really do. Good thing your ex boyfriend caught you in time. You shouldn't want to escape life. :) From what I have seen you are an amazing person.
(－_－) zzZ
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6:40pm Mar 26 2012
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Normal User
Posts: 655
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Hope you're feeling alright, Lazzaro :( you're a really really nice person. Things may be rough now but if you hang on they'll turn out alright, and you'll be glad you stayed :)
I'm pretty glad I found this thread, especially considering that I don't check non-market forums often. lol My mom drives me nuts sometimes. I do love her and I love my dad too, but sometimes - I know it's "normal" 'cause "I'm a teen and all" - she really does drive me crazy.
She didn't want me with my current boyfriend because he's Indian and I'm Taiwanese (or Chinese, if that's easier.) She even said flat out to me, "You know, if the boy you liked was Chinese, I'd have less of a problem with this." It got me so angry because she was just being racist like that. She's never even met him, yet she's making all of these really insane assumptions about him. I told her that he asked me to a formal dance, but we didn't dance when we got there since neither of us like dancing. She remarked that he was sneaky and was using me. I told her he wanted to go to Caltech (this was before we actually went to high school) but currently, his classes will probably never get him there, especially with affirmative action and such. Then my mom says not to trust him because he didn't keep his word. Whenever I talk about him she starts bugging me about why I like him and then starts to criticize both him and my "choice." She asks me why I don't like this other Chinese kid or that Taiwanese kid and is awfully pushy... >_> My dad used to be alright with me having a non-Chinese boyfriend but then my mom persuaded him otherwise.
Furthermore, they've forbidden me from having a boyfriend because they're afraid it'll mess up my studies. Apparently (almost) straight As in a bunch of honors and whatever classes, 3 academic competitions, 2 extra clubs, violin, and tennis aren't enough to convince them I'm fairly responsible (lol I'm pretty Asian :P). I also did all of this while I was with my boyfriend anyway. I would stand up to them (which I kind of never do because my mom is usually really stubborn and hardly understands) and tell them I wasn't going to break up with my boyfriend, but my mom kind of blackmailed me by pulling in one of my really important competitions into the situation (she said she wouldn't buy me wood to build with if I didn't dump him. What.) If I had a job I could probably care less, but I'm a couple of years away from being able to even have one.
I love my work and my competitions - my parents are still really nice and tell me to do things that interest me - but I care a lot about my boyfriend too, and I don't want to let go of a good influence in my life. I really mean it - we used to fight a LOT because in terms of interests and hobbies we are serious opposites, and sometimes I'm a little too outright or he misunderstands me and things go downhill from there - but we're working hard to accommodate each other and things are going so much better now. We're the best of friends and he's made me a better person, and I really don't see why I should break up with him just because of a half-racist parent. My almost-A grades are improving and I know I can handle everything academically, and so I'm still with him, but not to my parents' knowledge. My friend blurted it out accidentally and I had to lie all over again. Sometimes it really makes me feel bad because I usually don't lie to my mother, but I feel that it's the only thing I can do. :/ But if she finds out, she'll probably never trust me again.
Ugh. It just really complicates things for me.
Sorry that this was such a horrifyingly long post. :|
they/them/theirs :)
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8:22pm Mar 28 2012 (last edited on 10:41am Mar 31 2012)
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Normal User
Posts: 2,043
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  <---HA by shino || Buck by Zen---> |
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