DOCTOR FEELGOOD

PhD In Mad Science!

Licensed Medical Practitioner!*

#1 Up-And-Coming Evil Genius!**



Wow. Just look at all those achievements. What a stand-up guy, right? If I were you, I would definitely trust him with important things such as my spleen. Spleens are in short supply these days so you ought to have someone who can take proper care of yours. Someone like...



DOCTOR FEELGOOD!



With a name like that, you know exactly what you're getting. Today's big-name doctors don't know how to treat a patient. But DOCTOR FEELGOOD is different. DOCTOR FEELGOOD knows that you are a being with feelings and needs and organs! Some of which are more useful than others! And as a being, you are tired of the same old workplace drones performing your surgeries and handing out your antibiotic prescriptions. DOCTOR FEELGOOD will always go out of his way to make your medical procedure a fun and energetic experience. And you can rest easy knowing that he is the most fun and energetic doctor in a 27,114 mile radius. But that's not all! DOCTOR FEELGOOD knows that medicine is an evolving field. Sometimes you have to take risks to get results. That's why he's dedicated his life to progress. Already he has made many important breakthroughs in Mind Manipulation, Manufactured Creatures, Cyborg Secretaries, and other cool stuff. All for the benefit of YOUR health! Those other doctors charge an arm and a leg for the most basic of cures. But DOCTOR FEELGOOD only charges an arm! He has made his medical care affordable for anyone who requires it, no matter who they are– all species of living things are welcome, and all are equal in his extremely human eyes. He really is doing this out of the kindness of his own definitely-very-there HEART! Trust me. DOCTOR FEELGOOD knows what he's doing. I mean, just take a look at these amazing customer testimonials:



"I went to Doctor Feelgood when I was on the brink of death. Now I am freed from the failures of human flesh. Or at least my arm is. The doctor even threw in a bionic eye, free of charge. In return for part of my humanity, I was offered a job and a place to stay. I don't regret a thing! Thanks, Doc."

- Mileva "Millie" Malikova, Plucky Orphan Child And Secretary



"You probably haven't heard of Doctor Feelgood, he's kinda underground. Most people are only familiar with his cybernetics and a few of his more popular abominations. Bunch of posers. They don't understand the true genius of Feelgood, ya know? Like, all the mainstream doctors are just corporate sellouts, but Feelgood knows what REAL medicine is. Just like how I know what real music is. Yeah, if you listen to my radio show you might hear me talk about him. I also play some pretty sweet tunes there. Including some of Feelgood's music. Yeah, I bet you didn't know he made music, huh? Just tune in to... hey, why'd you stop writing? Aren't you gonna write this down?"

- Raymond D. O. Wavelength, Small Town DJ



"Um... I guess his hair is kind of cool? Like, in a... electrocuted lime slice kind-of-way? Okay, his personal style is really weird. Like, I don't even want to know what is up with his eyes. And the ethical side of his... uh, doctor work or whatever... like, I don't really know how legal it is, I didn't ask. But I guess he did do my prom dress alterations for free in exchange for informing him that my freak of an ex could use some professional help... and he's actually, like, a pretty good seamstress, even if his own outfits are... you know. So... yeah... that's all I've got. You should ask my sister about him, she knows more about this crazy goth stuff than I do."

- Jessica Smiles, Apathetic Prom Queen



"Where once there was the eternal bloody scream of heartbreak and guilt, there is now only sweet silence and strange stitches on my face. As a reward for being his fourth customer of the month, the doctor has taken me under his wing as his assistant. He tells me that he understands me and that we are similar in many ways. He says that through innovation, we can find meaning. That someday, the world will know my name. He has become a light in the darkness of my life... I think. Thank you, Doctor Feelgood, for showing me that even a hideous worm such as myself can have a purpose. I may never leave. I don't know if I can. I hope I don't regret this."

- Phinneas Brokenheart, Tortured Subculture Kid And Doctor's Assistant



"OMG, I just LOVE Doctor Feelgood! I know EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM! And if there's something I don't know about him, I'll LEARN it! I already know the names of every single test subject in his lab, and I can name every single one of his reported experiments in chronological order, and I've written exactly 501 emails to the doctor and he even sent one back once and I printed it out and put it on my wall right in front of my bed so I can look at it every night before I go to sleep and dream about being his assistant! It's my life's dream to work for him. I know he's already got a few employees, so there must be some sort of hiring process, but he's so secretive about that sort of thing. At least 459 of my emails mention wanting a job but he just won't tell me how to get one! Recently I've taken to showing up at his laboratory and asking his employees about him, since he hasn't emailed me back since June. They're pretty tight-lipped about their work, but the other day the doctor himself actually came out and talked to me! He told me to 'stop harassing his employees.' Which I think means I'm on the right path. OMG, I can't wait! I want to be just like him!!!"

- Jennifer Smiles, Maniacal Fangirl



"HE IS COMPLETELY TRUSTWORTHY. BECAUSE OF HIM I AM A BETTER BEING. HE HAS IMPROVED ON MY DESIGN IN EVERY WAY– HEALTH, POWER, NUMBER OF LIMBS, PHYSICAL APPEARANCE, ETC. AND HE CAN IMPROVE YOU TOO! WALK-INS PREFERRED. PHONE CALLS WILL BE MET WITH DISTASTE. EMAILS ARE OKAY BUT LOW PRIORITY AND WILL BE ANSWERED AS FEELGOOD SEES FIT. REFER A FRIEND AND GET ONE FREE CHECK-UP. OFFER AVAILABLE FOR A LIMITED TIME."

- Guy Personman, Sample Customer





*Subject is not actually a licensed medical practitioner. Trust him at your own peril.

**As voted by Deathblows Magazine readers in "Big Underground - This Month's Favorite Faces," Issue #27.

Robotik
ID: 3893506
Species: RSTU001
Color: uldavian
Gender: Female
Age: 721
Level: 1
Health: 19/19
Hunger: full
Power: 6
Defense: 5
Agility: 5
Intellect: 66
Nourishment: 7
Squishies: 35
Rarity: 0%
Status: Healthy
Emotion: Delighted
Birthday: 2022-12-02 00:25:31
URL: https://www.rescreatu.com/petpages/?id=3893506